Symbol Assignment- Smoke as Shame

Deep breath, inhale, exhale,
Head between my knees,
The air turns artificial, stale
I'll keep my eyes shut, squeeze

The air is a napkin on the tongue
Looking up, I see the source
Smoke is filling up the hallways
Lurking to the back of the throat, coarse

The more the air dries up,
The more my eyes water,
My hands become fishes that have escaped the bowl,
Shaking, trying to find some normalcy

If only I was free of the smoke,
I could push open the doors and
Feel the fresh, winter air
Smacking my face like a wake up call

But the smoke follows me
I escape to a diner, staring at a matchbook
Behind me, the windows have clouded up
The more one tries to get a better look, the more it obscures

They say even non-smokers will have gray lungs
From just existing in the city
From being exposed to those who hold the embers between their fingers
And inhale their fates

The churches, the schools
Have become factories
Pumping out thick, black clouds
When they could be growing trees

When I'm a body on a table
And they take a look inside
They'll see my lungs are gray, not black
That's how I lived my life

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